Where Do We Start? The Exciting First Steps of Surrogacy
A hopeful father sits across from us, notepad in hand, pages brimming with possibilities. He’s just spent three days at the @menhavingbabies conference, soaking in stories of resilience, flipping through brochures filled with pathways to parenthood, and listening to parents who were once in his shoes. Now, in the quiet of a one-on-one conversation, he smiles and says what so many before him have said
"Where do we start?"
Surrogacy is a journey of both heart and logistics, but what may feel like an overwhelming maze is really an incredible roadmap—one that leads to something life-changing. Every decision, from where to pursue the process to whom to trust along the way, is a step closer to the moment you hold your child for the first time.
U.S. or Abroad? Finding the Best Path Forward
One of the first big decisions intended parents make is where to pursue surrogacy. The exciting part? There’s no single “right” answer—just the one that best aligns with your vision.
The United States offers unparalleled legal protections, top-tier medical care, and well-established agencies to guide the process. The structure and safeguards here make it one of the safest routes, though costs are higher.
A hybrid approach—such as creating embryos in Canada but matching with a U.S. surrogate—can be a cost-effective middle ground.
International surrogacy in places like Mexico, Colombia, Argentina, or Georgia (the country) offers affordability, but navigating varying laws and citizenship requirements adds an extra layer of consideration.
No matter the location, the goal remains the same: a legally secure and ethical path to bringing your child home.
Fresh vs. Frozen: Tailoring the Egg Donation Process to Your Needs
Egg donation is another critical piece of the puzzle, and thanks to advances in reproductive medicine, intended parents have more choices than ever.
Frozen eggs provide flexibility, with pre-screened, mature eggs available immediately. Many programs offer guarantees, ensuring a minimum number of viable embryos.
Fresh donations allow for a customized match with a specific donor, though they require synchronization with a donor’s cycle and carry some unpredictability in egg retrieval outcomes.
Neither is “better” than the other—it all comes down to what works best for your journey, timeline, and comfort level.
Choosing the Right Agency and Clinic: The People Who Make the Difference
While an agency’s location might seem important, what truly matters is the level of care and support they provide:
Do they follow ASRM guidelines?
Do they rigorously screen surrogates to ensure they’re emotionally and physically ready for the process?
Are their surrogates motivated by a genuine desire to help build families?
A well-screened, well-supported surrogate makes all the difference in creating a journey built on trust and security.
With clinics, however, location does matter. Some states have surrogacy-friendly laws that automatically safeguard parental rights if IVF is completed there—regardless of where the surrogate delivers. Choosing a clinic in one of these states is not just a medical decision; it’s a strategic step toward ensuring a seamless process.
Independent Legal Counsel: Advocating for You Every Step of the Way
Navigating surrogacy is about more than contracts and logistics—it’s about protecting the future of your family. Some agencies handle legal services in-house, but their legal teams work for the agency, not necessarily for you.
Independent law firms (like ours) focus solely on your best interests. With every case handled directly by an attorney—not a caseworker or paralegal—you get dedicated legal expertise ensuring your rights are safeguarded at every turn.
The Next Step: A Conversation
Yes, there are decisions to make. Yes, there are moving parts. But surrogacy isn’t about tackling everything at once—it’s about taking one step at a time.
And that first step? It starts with a conversation.
Let’s talk.